When one insists that they be identified in a preferred manner – for whatever the reason, more than likely such only exacerbates the many unwanted perceptions held by the others. And, at best, the insistence of one’s preferred identity only masks the more realistic perceptions held by others – if the others are polite enough to mask their likely realistic perceptions of the first party. Because, making such a demand of others typically only invites the others to perceive the first party as an oddball (for even making such demands) and rarely are the resulting perceptions of the type sought by the first party.
To put the matter differently, one cannot control how others in the world perceive anything – as a general rule. Much less, can anyone typically control how folks perceive others. Those who attempt to control or unduly influence the thoughts of others show their likely ignorance of the human thought-process. Because to tell others how to perceive anything, especially related to one’s own personality, likely only causes the others to think how weird or insecure the first person must be to make such demands.
As a mild example of how perceptions typically diverge, and regardless of any demands to the contrary, merely ask a friend to profess how they desire or believe any others in the world actually perceive the friend. Only rarely will any self-professed identity of the friend match the perceived identity of the friend by others. When demanding or trying to force any perceptions by or onto others, the views diverge even more drastically.
To force any identity in the minds of others typically only makes the others think less of the one trying to dictate their identity to the world. This is a reality clearly unknown to anyone who attempts to force any preferred perceptions of themselves to the world and/or dictate any perceptions of oneself subsequently held by the world. Much to the chagrin of commercial advertisers and fascists alike, and while first impressions may account for something with the power of suggestion always in play, people will perceive others how they prefer to perceive the others, regardless of what is demanded of their perceptions.
AVT (October 2020)
See: “Push me, Pull you”; located at: http://poetrybyadamvernontrotter.blogspot.com/2014/09/push-me-pull-you.html.